Often when I start to write, I am overtaken by a slight sorrow, as though I've trained myself that in order to connect with my heart, deep inside, it helps me to be sad. Yet, since my current life's intention is to cultivate joy, this is hard for me to understand. As with much going on for me right now, I don't get it.
A thought came to me today as this sensation gently tapped on my awareness: perhaps I am misinterpreting it. After all, it's not as though heart signals are clear, not for me and not all the time at least. So without too much reflection, I decide upon the meaning of what I feel. Hum, interesting... Implulsive intuition?
If I'm going to trust my intuition, perhaps a bit more focus and attention would be helpful. Sit with it. Maybe that feeling indicates something else. It would be novel to go beyond that seeming sorrow to notice more deeply. The ripples and reflections of what confronts me add to this sense of internal disorientation - this is new work, new perspective. And with some effort, I can shift to that most hopeful of places, curiosity. That would be an elegant way to continue my exploration.