There is nothing about this that is easy. Whenever the day seems to be simple, there is something I am not taking into account. And as though the challenge itself weren't enough, I notice that when I work at understanding or learning or even just sorting out what is going on, it simply adds dark clouds and confusing mist, the threat of rain.
Can I move beyond my obvious discomfort when I am captured by this process, left only with the appearance of control? Can I find a way to retain - or regain - my balance in this moment or the next?
What I know - or, rather, what I hope proves to be the case - is that there is no failing here. There is no thought or feeling or action that I ought to be engaging that I am not. Often, that calms me. And I find myself remembering the little practices - one step, one breath, one moment; that thoughts and feelings are just that and nothing more - all those tools I've been shown to move me along and through.
So I sit, in discomfort and as much as possible without judgment. I sit, waiting, watching for a gentle breeze and soft sunlight.
Blessings
Marco
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